Finally, 30 years or so after being released, Pretty Woman was seen by yours truly recently. Richard "Gerbil" Gere and Julia "Sigh" Roberts star, as you know. What has this to do with me? It's all about KTV.
For the uninitiated (i.e. people not from Asia) KTV lounges are Karaoke bars. You you only embarrass yourself with inebriated displays of tone-deaf idiocies (which you should be more cautious about, with Youtube and cellphone video cameras around). However over here, a trip to the "KTV lounge" gives new meaning to musical phrases like "deep throated", "rhythm and melody", and of course "climax". Yes, it is basically a strip joint with value added services, which, to use a phrase from the limit principles of calculus, approaches a brothel but is not quite it.
And I, the Single Guy, at some unspecificed point in the past 6 weeks was dragged to one of these. The mama-san proudly brought her stable, and following my friends' lead I picked my companion. She gave a heartrending story about why she became a KTV girl. Just as it looked like a Pretty Woman moment, she shamelessly overquoted me for her additional services (they expect to be tipped for gyrating on your lap, that is the basic service). Shameless only because she quoted so high, I would rather learn gymnastics and do it myself, if you catch my drift.
Of course they sang horribly, tried very hard to impress us, were hideous looking and as with strippers all over the world, need an introduction to personal hygiene and the bidet. None of this deterred the mama-san who proudly passed around her business card for future visits.
I left my friends to cavort and beat a hasty retreat.
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