Once more, an article on mankind's premature death. And only man-kind's.
"MEN who face plenty of competition to find a mate have slightly shorter lives than those who don't. New research shows that gender imbalance, when men outnumber women, affects male longevity by an average of about three months."
A little later, this:
"After calculating the gender ratios for each high school class they noticed that 50 years later men from classes with more boys than girls did not live as long as those from more balanced classes."
By now you know the routine: Caustic questions, considerations and suggestions:
1. Send your boys to all-girls schools. It is all about probabilities. But do not, under any circumstance, allow them to get involved in "fashion". If they use "fashion" and "design" in the same sentence, disown them. FYI, when I was really small, they sent me to an all-girls school because they let boys in just for kindergarten. Ha! I bet I have a couple of years right there.
2. I am sorry for all of those of you who went to boys-only schools. For your early death and all the time you spent playing "Soggy Biscuit".
3. Did the study take into account the trauma faced by 11-year old boys bullied by their much larger female counterparts thanks to earlier puberty, armed with dangerous new weapons such as "breasts"?
4. Has the study taken into account *quality* of life, instead of just the number of years? I believe that when they tested the Large Hadron Collider, they discovered that Dark Matter is made up of Life that has been sucked out of men after Marriage.
5. I hope for your sake you did not compete in "The Bachelorette". I don't know what it is, but assume it is a "reality" show featuring several men chasing one bimbo. On the other hand, perhaps it is a great demonstration of Darwinian mechanisms in action.
6. Finally what does this mean for men who *do not* want to find a mate and refuse to engage in the "rat race", so to speak? Will they live longer than those that die (sooner) trying?
PS: "I will live forever or die trying" is of course protagonist Yossarian's quote from Catch-22. Read it if you have not already done so.
3 comments:
CY,
Point No. 7- Men looking for mate probably find the mate, get shagged and die happy. ;)
~div
#4 precludes #7 from ever becoming true or even possible.
Point 4 only preculdes 7 if one follows the assumption that marriage is an essential part in the mate-claiming process. Marriage requires monogamy- mate claiming on the other hand... ;)
~div
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